Season 2/Episode 3: Jill and Tony, The Relationship Whisperers
In this week’s episode, Jill and Tony reveal they are relationship whisperers. That means they instinctively know if someone is a good partner or a good fit for you.
Writing
Season 2/ Episode 1: Do Something Different This Year
In this week’s episode, Jill and Tony talked about their quest to do something different this year, whether in relationships or other aspects of their life.
Episode 49: To Agree or Disagree: Ideal for Birthdays, Other Special Occasions?
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Art: Nick Zinkie
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In All Seriousness
Acts of Kindness in Relationships
In this week’s episode, Tony and Jill discussed whether you should avoid debates or full-blown arguments on your partner’s birthday, or any other special occasions.
Tony told listeners that if their partner feels compelled to be nicer to them on a birthday or holiday, then they should consider how their partner treats them overall.
Meanwhile, Jill advised listeners to accept that their partner may not be thankful for the extra nice treatment.
Both Jill and Tony have advice:
- If you are into birthdays and your partner isn’t, consider what would make them feel appreciated that date
- Don’t be afraid to tell your partner what makes you happy
- Respect and love each other daily
What do you do for your partner on birthdays and other special occasions? Leave your responses in the comments section.
Also tell us–preferably with an audio file–what relationship topic you’d like for us to offer input or advice on to help you or someone you know.
Episode 47: Is it Realistic to Forgive and Forget?
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Art: Nick Zinkie
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In All Seriousness
Is a Grudge the Same as Not Forgetting?
In this week’s episode, Jill and Tony discussed whether forgiving and truly forgetting is achievable.
Tony encouraged listeners to forgive and forget, but he also said that there are some situations that you should remember, so that you don’t get burned the next time.
Meanwhile, Jill told listeners who don’t have a good memory to work on improving it because it will help with future relationships.
They both have the following advice for all listeners:
- Do not hold grudges. They hurt you.
- Understand that forgiveness is intended to help you.
- If you find that you can neither forgive nor forget what someone has done to you, find the courage to leave the relationship because the situation will become a wall between the two of you.
Have you ever been able to forgive and forget? If so, how did you do it? Leave your answers in the comments section.
Also, leave a question that you’d like to see us address. We prefer that you send us an audio file, limited to 90 seconds, of your asking the question, but we will also accept written questions. We will select ones to share with our entire audience starting in Season 2, which begins in January 2020.
Episode 45: Are Training and Teaching the Same Thing in Relationships?
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Art: Nick Zinkie
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In All Seriousness
Words Matter
In this week’s episode, Tony was offended by Jill saying that she has trained him to change a few of his habits. He agreed, however, that partners can teach each other. In short, training and teaching were interchangeable for Jill, but not for Tony.
He told listeners that if you are in a relationship with someone who says you have been trained by them, respond to them in a calm manner that the word “trained” is incorrect.
Meanwhile, Jill encouraged listeners to help each other grow. If you use certain words that offend your partner, use other words.
Together, they have more advice:
- Let your partner know what upsets you, but make sure you do it in a loving way
- Listen to each other
- Recognize that compromises are intended to be win-win outcomes
What do you think about conditioning your partner to change behaviors that suit you better? Leave your answers in the comments section. Let us know what topics you’d like to hear us tackle.
Episode 42: Who do you Need in Your Life?
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Podcast Art: Nick Zinkie
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In All Seriousness
Be Selective About People you Deem Friends
In this week’s episode, Jill and Tony talked about the importance of surrounding yourself with people who are in your corner.
Tony told listeners to take a close look at the people who are in your life. If someone brings nothings but drama, pain, or heartache, then you need to distance yourself or remove that person from your life.
He has more advice:
- Remember that the company you keep can affect your quality of life
- Consider whether someone has had a positive effect on you. Those are the ones to keep in your life.
- Do not forget to love yourself, too.
Jill told listeners, paraphrasing Maya Angelou, to believe people when they show you who they are.
She urges listeners to do the following:
- If someone you consider a friend betrays you or is guilty of some other wrongdoing against you, determine whether it was just one bad decision on their part or something ongoing. Try to talk it out if you think they are a true friend. No one is perfect, after all.
- If you find you need to distance yourself from someone, consider walking away without a fight. Chances are arguing about it is only going to make things worse.
- Do not hold grudges. It eats away at you, not the other person.
Who are your friends? What criteria do you use to determine that they are not your enemies? Leave your answers in the comments section.
In the meantime, join us at our podcast-related meetup on Saturday, Oct. 26. We’ve planned some fun activities and giveaways.
Episode 40: Who is the Follower in Your Relationship?
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Podcast Art: Nick Zinkie
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In All Seriousness
Let’s Decide Together
In this week’s episode, Tony and Jill discussed how they determine tasks in their household.
He told listeners to ask questions about who does what early on in the relationship, so that if you opt to live together later on, there will likely be fewer surprises.
He has other suggestions, too:
- Compromise, if necessary
- Keep each other accountable about what each agreed to do
- Hold your anger if one person doesn’t keep the commitment; talk it out as soon as possible
Jill told listeners to talk out issues with role assignments, but if nothing ever changes, and there appear to be bigger issues, you may consider leaving that relationship behind.
She has three other tips:
- Keep communication lines open
- Switch leader-follower roles from time to time
- Work together for the best outcomes
How do you determine who does what in your relationship? Let us know in the comments section. Hope to see you at our meetup on Oct. 26!
Episode 38: When Your Relationship Changes Because you Did
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Podcast Art: Nick Zinkie
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Coming Soon: The I’m Right! I’m Right Meetup
Saturday, Oct. 26
2:30 p.m. – 4:30 p.m.
Huey Luey’s Mexican Kitchen
(You can buy whatever food and drink you want)
Rooftop Seating Area
3338 Cobb Parkway
Acworth, GA 30101
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In All Seriousness
Expect to Evolve, Hope to Grow Together
In this week’s episode, Tony and Jill discussed how much they’ve changed since they first met. In their case, they believe their change, especially when they changed together, helped them reach an all-time high in their relationship. In essence, they believed their changes–individual ones and those they did as a couple–were mostly positive.
Jill brought up the times her changes resulted in a significant weight gain. She thanked Tony for not loving her any less.
Jill told listeners to avoid being a dream killer.
As always, she has other tips:
- Expect change. Few people stay the same forever.
- Embrace growth. Change is often a sign of moving forward.
- Avoid staying in the past. Remember that you can’t change what has already happened, but you can grow and progress in the days ahead.
Tony advised listeners, when meeting someone, to really take the time to know the person.
He suggested they also do the following:
- Be honest with yourself and with each other about changes.
- Consider that change can either enhance or destroy a relationship, but don’t make snap judgments about it.
- Strive for open communication, no matter the changes.
In what ways have you changed during your relationship with your significant other? How did your partner respond? Have you followed any of Jill and Tony’s suggestions? Which ones? Leave your responses in the comments section at the bottom of this page.
Thanks as always for your support. Join Jill and Tony in person at their first meetup related to this podcast. Details are near the top of this page.
Episode 36: When Friendship Codes Matter
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Podcast Art: Nick Zinkie
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In All Seriousness
Coded Relationships
In this week’s relationship, Jill and Tony discussed facets of the bro code and sistah/girlfriend code. For example, women often live by an unspoken rule that anyone they are interested in is off limits to their friends.That often applies to when the friend is in the relationship with her love interest… and after it ends, too.
Tony took the conversation to a completely different place when he first described what’s included in the bro code. If you missed it, you’ll just have to listen to the episode.
In the meantime, Tony advised listeners to keep their number of close friends to a minimum. He said you should have only a few close friends, and some may even seem like or better than family.
He also has other tips:
- Embrace having friendship codes if they enhance the respect level and create appropriate boundaries.
- Be aware that some codes–the bro code, for example– can create an environment for cheating. Pay attention.
- Discuss friendship codes with your friends and your partner. Transparency is great for relationships..
Jill also told listeners that to have good friends, you must be a good one. Lead by example.
She also has other advice:
- Know who your true friends are. Not everyone is your friend.
- Build all of your relationships on trust. Without it, what’s the point?
- Respect your friend’s relationships with others, even those you personally do not care for. Surround yourself with people who respect your relationships, too.
What codes do you think friends and partners should have? What have you experienced that worked or failed? Please leave your responses in our comments section. Let us know what you thought of this episode too, while you’re at it.
