advice

Episode 33: Why do People Cheat?

Producer: Jill Cox-Cordova
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Podcast Art: Nick Zinkie
Follow us on Facebook

Subscribe for Free to Our Podcast

.

In All Seriousness

Don’t Commit to a Cheater

We thank you for listening to our podcast. You have helped us rank in the top 50% of podcasts about relationships. We have big goals, however, and our next goal is to make it into the top 20%. Please help us by telling those you know who like podcasts.

In this week’s episode, we discussed many reasons why some people cheat, and their partners stay with them.

We both urged listeners to be honest with themselves and their partners about the situation.

Tony also has some other tips to offer:

  • If you are a person that cheats on your partner. Take a moment to try to figure out why.
  • Also think about the person you’re cheating on. How would you feel if they cheated on you? If you don’t care how it affects your partner emotionally, please try to be nice enough to let them go, if they don’t have the strength to leave you.
  • Please, please, please, if you are the person that’s being cheated on, find the strength to leave them. You are worth more than that, you deserve better than that. Love yourself.

Jill also has some advice for listeners:

  • If you find that partner after partner cheats on you, try to determine why.
  • If you end a relationship because your partner cheats on you, don’t feel like you have to tell everyone or anyone. Some so-called friends have a tendency to make you feel worse about it. So, only tell others if it makes you feel better to release the truth.
  • Don’t try to change a cheater. You only have control of yourself.

Have you ever cheated on someone or been in a relationship with a cheater? How did that relationship play out? Leave your comments below. Don’t forget to catch up on any missed episodes.

Episode 32: Are You a Good Listener?

Producer: Jill Cox-Cordova
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Podcast Art: Nick Zinkie
Follow us on Facebook

Subscribe for Free to Our Podcast

.

In All Seriousness

Listen to Learn

In this week’s episode, Jill and Tony both urged you to take time to listen to your partner. You might even learn something.

Tony also has more advice:

  • Recognize that being a good listener strengthens your relationship.
  • Not a good listener? Try not to interrupt until your partner is finished speaking.
  • Remember that if you want and need be to heard, show your partner the same respect. Listening to your partner shows them how much you care for them and their thoughts.

Jill also has more tips:

  • Strive to talk to each other, not at each other.
  • Make time each day to have real conversations with each other.
  • Feel you’re not being heard? Talk it out. Lead by example.

Are you and your partner both good listeners? What do you do when you realize you haven’t been heard? If you’re the one who isn’t a good listener, what are you going to do to improve?

Leave your responses in the comments section.

Episode 31: Do you Feel Trapped?

Producer: Jill Cox-Cordova
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Podcast Art: Nick Zinkie
Follow us on Facebook
.

In All Seriousness

Free Yourself

This week’s episode included a lot of tips about how to free yourself if you’re feeling trapped in your relationship, your life.

Tony has several more suggestions to offer:

  • Determine the root of why you feel trapped.
  • Be honest with yourself about whether you or your partner is the problem. You both might have added to the situation.
  • You–not your friends or family–make the choice about what you need to do about it.

Jill also has more advice:

  • Understand there is always a way out.
  • Be willing to do all that you can to fix the issue.
  • But if none of your efforts work, be strong and courageous. Leave to live a better life.

Have you ever felt trapped? What did you do about it? Leave your answers in the comments section. Don’t forget to subscribe or tell us your topic ideas.

Episode 30: Is Your Picker Off? A PG-Rated Production

Producer: Jill Cox-Cordova
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Podcast Art: Nick Zinkie

Subscribe for Free to Our Podcast

.

In All Seriousness

Be Happy With Yourself

In this week’s episode, Jill and Tony agreed that the best way to choose a partner who is perfect for you is to first determine who you are, what you like, and stay true to yourself.

Tony also has other suggestions for people in relationships:

  • Understand that we often choose partners who are like our parents, or we become the dysfunctional parents that raised us. Avoid this for a healthy and loving relationship.
  • Listen to the people who are closest to you; they love you and have your best interests at heart.
  • Let the people closest to you check out the person you’re interested in. If they say that they’re not a good match you, chances are they are right. Take their advice, and end the relationship.

Jill also has some advice:

  • Trust your gut. It’s probably right.
  • Try not to have a type. If your picker is off, your “type” isn’t working for you.
  • Be open to falling in love with someone who doesn’t have all the things on your list of ideal traits. Remember that no one is perfect. Prioritize what trait are the most important to you.

Have you found the right person for you? How long did it take you? How did you know they were the right person? Leave your answers in the comments section.

Episode 29: Do You Need Time and Space to be Alone?

Producer: Jill Cox-Cordova
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Podcast Art: Nick Zinkie
Follow us on Facebook

Subscribe for Free to Our Podcast

.

In All Seriousness

Be You: Make Time for Yourself

In this week’s episode, Jill and Tony agreed that there’s nothing wrong with spending time and space away from your partner every now and then, but don’t do it too much.

Jill told listeners to take time for self-care.

She has more advice:

  • Recognize who you are as a couple and who you are as an individual. Learn to love both identities.
  • Take turns doing what your partner likes to do and doing what you enjoy as well. Don’t make it one-sided.
  • Don’t forget your friends, unless you find they are not good for you or your relationship.

Meanwhile, Tony also advised listeners to do things on your own occasionally.

He has a few more tips:

  • Remember who you are as a person. Retaining who you are as an individual is important.
  • Don’t overdo it. Spending too much time with your friends or alone can be a sign that there may be a problem in your relationship.
  • Create a balance in your relationship. Talk to your partner; find out what works best for both of you.

What has worked for you? Which of these tips have you tried? Leave your answers in the comments section. Don’t forget to subscribe or catch up on listening to all of our episodes.

Episode 28: The Green Acres Edition


Producer: Jill Cox-Cordova
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Podcast Art: Nick Zinkie
Follow Us on Facebook

Subscribe for Free to Our Podcast

.

In All Seriousness

Compromising Differences

In this week’s episode, Jill and Tony compromised on Tony’s idea to spend time in the country for an entire month.

Tony suggested that you keep an open mind if you have a partner who encourages you to try new things. You may even enjoy yourself.

He also has other advice:

  • Avoid getting stuck in a rut doing the same things. Try to do something you didn’t think you would like.
  • Embrace finding the many ways to add joy to your life.
  • Understand that your partner may be able to see what will make you happy before you do.

During the episode, Jill suggested that you try things at least once, but with the understanding that it’s okay if you don’t enjoy it enough to ever do it again.

She has other tips:

  • Stay true to who you are. Your trying something your partner likes doesn’t mean you have to stop doing what you enjoy.
  • Retain your identity. Sometimes it’s easy to get lost in your identity as a couple. Remember that you are individuals, too.
  • Don’t be afraid to compromise. When done right, both partners win.

Has your partner pushed you to do something you didn’t really want to do? How did you resolve that situation? Leave your answers in the comments section. Also tell us what topics you’d like to see us cover. Don’t forget to subscribe.

Episode 27: Do You Take Enough Risks?

Producer: Jill Cox-Cordova
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Podcast Art: Nick Zinkie
Follow us on Facebook

Subscribe for Free to Our Podcast

.

In All Seriousness

Live Your Life

In this week’s episode, Jill and Tony agreed that in order to grow, we all must do things outside of our comfort zones.

Jill has additional advice:

  • If you find yourself reluctant to try new things, truly weigh the pros against the cons.
  • Try at least one new thing a month.
  • If you’re in a relationship, chances are that you have separate interests. If you try something your partner enjoys, it can open up many possibilities for you and increase the bond the two of you have.

Tony has some suggestions, too.

  • It’s a great idea to take risks while in a relationship, especially if you take risks together.
  • There are all types of risk, of course. Take ones that move you out of your comfort zone.
  • Some risks can be dangerous, like skydiving, or scrubber driving, or maybe riding a motorcycle at 130 mph. Those may make you feel alive. Whatever risks you decide to take, try to do it with your partner before the end of the year.

What risks have you taken lately? What do you do to get yourself out of your comfort zone? Leave your answers in the comments section. Don’t forget to subscribe and listen to previous episodes, if you aren’t caught up on listening to our podcast.

Thanks for your support.

Episode 26: Mr. Jill: An Insult or a Joke?

Producer: Jill Cox-Cordova
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Podcast Art: Nick Zinkie
Follow us on Facebook

Subscribe for Free to Our Podcast

.

In All Seriousness

What’s in a Name?

In this week’s episode, Jill said to avoid dwelling on labels or titles that others give you.

Instead, she suggests doing the following:

  • Understand that you will encounter people who will call you something besides your name. Determine why they did it. Chances are they are just joking. If they aren’t, tell them how you feel.
  • Realize that some people just want to give you nicknames. Feel free to return the favor.
  • Know who you are, so that you can tell and show others when you need to do so.

In this week’s episode, Tony told listeners to not tell their partner if they were called a name that would make the other one seem demanding or bossy.

He has other tips, too:

  • Titles can mean a lot to some people while in a relationship, so if someone gives you a nickname that makes them and you smile, accept it. It’s all in fun.
  • Be able to laugh at yourself and to laugh with others about yourself. Try not to take everything so seriously.
  • Life is too special and short to worry about little things. Try loving one another.     

Have you experienced the same situation that Tony and Jill described. If so, what did you do about it? Leave your answers in the comments section. Don’t forget to subscribe and catch up on listening to our podcast.

Episode 25: How to Know You’re With the Right Person

Producer: Jill Cox-Cordova
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Podcast Art: Nick Zinkie
Follow us on Facebook

Subscribe for Free to Our Podcast

.

In All Seriousness

No One is Perfect, but who is Perfect for You?

In this episode, there was no real debate. Instead, we discussed what we needed and wanted in a partner when we met. We also offered advice for you because you know, that’s what we do.

Tony told listeners to not rush into a relationship.

He also has the following suggestions:

  • Make sure that you are happy with yourself first. Another person will never be able to keep you happy, unless you are already happy.
  • Take your time. Make sure that you have many things in common, and that you have a physical and love attraction for each other. The right person for you should also be your best friend.
  • Be yourself. If you can’t be your true self around the person that you think is the right person you, this is a clear sign that you’re not with the right person. They are not your soul mate.

Jill also told listeners to not change who they are to attract someone.

She also has other tips:

  • Be honest with yourself about the things you can tolerate for the rest of your life.
  • Do not make everything a deal breaker.
  • Recognize that no one, including you, is perfect.

Who is your ideal partner? If you’re in a relationship, how did you know they’re the one? What topics would you like to hear us debate? Leave your responses in the comments section. Don’t forget to subscribe, if you haven’t already.

Episode 24: Are Your Friends Causing Problems in Your Relationship?

Producer: Jill Cox-Cordova
Tech Op/Editor: Anthony Cordova
Music: Gifford Ivan Cordova III
Podcast Art: Nick Zinkie
Follow Us on Instagram

Subscribe for Free to Our Podcast

.

In All Seriousness

Awkward Friend Zones

In this week’s podcast, Tony and Jill agreed that you should be able to have a relationship with a person who is of the sex that you’re attracted to. Of course, sometimes issues arise if someone feels that their relationship is threatened.

Jill advised listeners to communicate with each other if one felt uncomfortable with a friendship the other one has.

She has other tips:

  • Be aware of who your friends really are.
  • Listen to and respect your partner’s concern if he or she has a problem with your friend. You may be too close to the situation to truly see what is happening.
  • Don’t be afraid to drop a friend if you find that he or she is toxic to you or your relationship.

Tony advised people to stay aware of people who may have ulterior motives.

He has more thoughts on the topic:

  • It can be easier to have this kind of friendship if you grew up with the person in question, and you never developed any romantic feelings for each other.
  • If you develop a friendship with a person that you met at your job, be honest with your partner about it. Otherwise, this scenario often ends badly for both people.
  • Be honest with your partner and your friend from the start.

Have you tried any of these tips? What worked for you? Leave your answers in the comments section.