Season 2/ Episode 28: When Is it Time to Speak up for Yourself?
In All Seriousness
Should You Tell Them to Kiss It?
In this week’s episode, Jill and Tony talked about tolerance levels and knowing when to speak up for yourself.
Tony discussed the times he’s had to tell people to kiss his ass. Jill does not use profanity, so she talked about what she’s said to defend herself.
Tony urged listeners to tell someone to kiss their behind, but only if that person deserves it. He said that person will likely not bother you anymore.
Jill advised listeners to not let things fester, but be prepared for what happens next.
They have other suggestions:
- Try talking things out calmly first. You never know what someone is going through to make them snap at others.
- Do not make everything a fight.
- Understand that you can change behaviors, but do not try to alter someone’s personality. It won’t work anyway.
When you had to speak up for yourself, how did you do it? We love hearing from you, so please leave your answers in the comments section.
First, Denis really hopes he’s not the dumb-ass Jill had to work with. If he is, he’s thankful Jill didn’t call him the aforementioned name. Hahahaha
It seems Tony has/is dealing with a macho element, who respond well to aggressive measures. I’ve seen this in movies where characters respect and value the guy who tells them off. As far as the man who told Tony he would string him up, that’s abuse, pure and simple. Makes my skin crawl.
In other environments we probably should rely on “our words.” When I worked for United, I was often given a special assignment that put me in a position of authority without really having any authority. These little jobs were a great break from the tedium of nonstop calls, and some of my co-workers resented my getting these assignments. They would give me a hard time, but somehow I knew I had to stand up to them, and I did! It surprised me that I could do it. Hahaha. I used my words—profanity would have gotten me demoted back to phones in a New York minute. So much depends on the situation. The only problem with words is that as Denis says so many times comebacks comeback too late.
Denis also reminds me that many times we ignore insults and slights. We may hope that they will just go away. However, usually the situation escalates. Feelings fester and eventually the bullied party overreacts. I think there are many times in my life when giving a gentle warning might have served me well, but again my pithy comebacks come back too late.
Sometimes I think the offending party is making a fool of themselves, that others will notice, but you know what—when it’s not happening to them—people let it go. Usually the offending person is such an ignoramus—I mean to say these things in first place, come on—they don’t catch on. It’s up to the offended to deliver a warning before things spiral out of control. The world is a tough place at times.
Thanks for your comment. Denis ranks as one of my favorite former bosses, so no, he was definitely not the person I was referencing as a dumb-ass. Hahahhaa!
Yes, you’re right about what happens when we ignore insults and slights. We also agree with you about how sometimes comebacks can come back too late.
Good for you for standing up for yourself. Yes, those offended have to fire warning shots because occasionally people do not realize what they said or did. Even if they did, they’ve been warned.
Thanks again for listening and commenting. We love hearing from you.
Denis says, “Whew!”
Hahaha! 😃